Shutting Down The Negative Energy

I don't want to go to Negative Land. Do you?

My friends, this is a sensitive subject. Negative Land is only a few words away on any given school day. How do I know that? I've been there far to many times myself. Sometimes it's been me giving off the negative vibes. Shame on me! And, sometimes it's the person everyone runs from (which...could be me), because they know the rain is about to come down on somebodies parade. Regardless, Happy Schools cannot function when the "Negative Nay Sayers" get their attitude all swirled into a frenzy.

As much as I don't want to touch on this sensitive subject, we must. It is imperative to the health of a Happy School to speak to the negative personality that can bring "happy" to a screeching halt. 

Let me lay some ground work. First, we aren't talking about the fact everyone has a "Benny's Bad Day" day. We are not talking about the understandable upsets that come along the way in a school day. We aren't talking about the occasional life events that are impossible to not bring to school on a day or even a few days.

We are stepping into the arena of "chronic negativity". The kind of negativity that can do damage to a child's day with one word and to an adult's day with two. The kind of negativity that leaves adults and children wanting a ear swab when the person leaves the room. I don't know why some people thrive on being negative over positive. I can't explain the choice to be hateful and polarize people with negative vibes. I've met people battling horrid trials in their lives, who do so with such positive energy. They bring inspiration to the table with everyone they meet. Yet, there are others that have ruined a perfectly good day at the thought they might have to do more than they expected to do in a school day. Or, they fall apart because the schedule isn't going to be what they expected. Or, they know they do more than everyone else ever does....nobody EVER says "thank you". Or, someone didn't make enough coffee....again! Or, they get bent out of shape when someone won't do their job for them. The "Or" list could go on and on. You probably could add dozens you've experienced at your school. 

Here is an idea for a solution. I have a co-worker that has the most positive way of shutting down negative energy. My co-worker will genuinely (not patronizingly) smile, look the person in the eyes, give a hug to the "negative energy ball" and walk away. No ugly words, no agreeing, no getting sucked into the vortex of negativity. Is my positive friend able to do that every time? No. My friend is human. What I do know is my co-worker friend had no control over the other person's choice to behave negatively. My co-worker did have a choice to not allow that person to affect their stress level or the happiness of their day in the classroom or out. It also gave the other person a definitive sign they were not going to ruin my co-workers day. We can hope the negative co-worker will eventually see "happy" is much better to live inside. 

With all of the difficult issues facing our nation today, we need to bring more happiness to the table.We need it for our mental and physical health's sake. Our children need to feel it coming from us for their best health. During this summer break I've been thinking about different co-workers that fought off the "negative" vibes moving into their school day world last year. It makes me smile. Alright, it makes me happy. I'll share one memory from last school year.

I watched a team of co-workers facing daily struggles as they were striving to reach out to a more difficult to teach group of students. The students were well behaved for the most part. They simply were not the easiest to grasp concepts and retain them. I watched this team of teachers turn their frustration from negative energy into funny, silly things they did together all year. Sometimes they dressed up in costumes. They came up with all sorts of team teaching themes and ideas. I loved watching them work. They kept a hilarious photo album of antics they knew other teacher would think was funny. They laughed together, cried together, prayed together. On the super tough days, when negativity was all down on them, they held each other up. What I observed was a class unit of children and teachers that faired well after a tough year. The teachers were closer as friends. The children loved and respected their teachers...well, almost all the children. You know how that goes. The children DID learn and the teachers realized how strong they were together....united with positive energy. 

I want to encourage you (and myself ) to stop the "negative" fire before it get's started when this new year rolls around. Decide you are going to hold up against what will surely bring you down. When stressful days come around, you can handle it with some creative "happiness". Stop everything and turn your favorite happy music on and let the class get happy with you for five minutes. My boss does that and it has rescued us from insanity many times. Chill out! Break into song. Kinda scary----but truly funny, happy, five-minute, spontaneous, vacations can clean away the mental negativity mess. 

I hope you continue to enjoy your summer break. Make a little time for you to practice ideas for how you will protect your "happy" teaching heart. Pinterest ideas, come up with a "positivity" plan with a co-worker, start a journal of funny school stories, pick out your list of "go to" happy songs, put those songs on your computer at work--bookmarked and ready to go, and begin your plan to walk away from negativity next school year. Be Happy!

Part Two of the Healthy School Tree

A Healthy School Tree

Let's turn our focus to a few of the top healthy elements within a school families tree. 

I much prefer to focus on the positives. It comes naturally to me to want to have a positive attitude. Maybe, that is because I'm lazy. I was always taught it's much easier to be positive and I still believe that...most of the time. Speaking of positive, I happen to teach within a school family that I am truly fond of being a with. This being the case, it's easy for me to come up with some driving factors for retaining a healthy school life. The number one factor is sincerely caring about one another. What better example can we as adults show our school children than to sincerely care about one another? Once again, this has nothing to do with being everybody's best friend or even liking everything about everybody. This has to do with human kindness, caring, and empathy. 

My school has a social committee. Everyone is invited to be a part and nothing is decided upon that would make it financially or socially uncomfortable for anyone on our staff. For example, we give baby and wedding showers at school, preceding the weekly Staff Meeting. We have made it a point to not allow our celebrations to become a burden in any fashion. Therefore, we have great support, attendance, and most of all lots of fun!! 

We have a network, through text, e-mail, or calling, to let our Staff Family know when one of us has suffered a loss, a medical emergency, or any other catastrophic incident. We make sure to communicate our concern for those individuals. Once again, the glue that holds this gesture in place is sincerity. Nobody is talking about getting full on into someone's private life. This isn't being nosey, gossipy, or impertinent. I'm on the turf of caring.

Here is a stand out element. We try our best to pay attention. "Pay Attention", you say. Yes. The school day isn't about the kids at all times. Not at a healthy Happy School. The day is also about noticing how our school family is doing/feeling. We can all pass each other in the hallway and be busy in thought or have kiddos we are trying to herd into straight lines. "Give me a bubble", "Purple line-purple line", "I'll wait"..... and before we know it, we realize we haven't even noticed the adults passing us. Happens to me all the time. But, when we pass a co-worker that has an expression of sadness, worry, frustration on their faces that should stand out to our hearts. It will, because we know that person well enough to understand something may be hurting them. We pay attention to our peers. A family cares about each other. A healthy school environment is filled with compassion.

We never know what our peers may be going home to in the afternoons. They may be struggling through a bump in their marriage or worse, they may be facing divorce. They may have recently lost someone dear to them. They may be suffering with health issues, a spouses' job loss, an abusive spouse, or have someone in their family that is ill. They may simply be exhausted from being up all night with a new baby then coming in to teach wiped out day after day. Or, they may be a single parent, who is trying to get their master's degree and be the best at their job everyday. My mother did this. I still don't know how she did it with three children. My boss does it with two teens. I admire both of these women so much. 

Let's all pay more attention. Make a point to let others know you care. There are endless ideas for expressing concern. I think this is a great idea. Take the time to slip an encouraging note in their box. One of my friends did that for me at the first of the year. She was paying attention and felt an encouraging note would lift me up. It did. I put that card in a special place and it gets my attention daily. My school staff is amazing at doing those caring gestures and it makes a proactive, positive difference in our overall morale. You never know when a little piece of chocolate or a random hug is just what a person needs to get through their day. Or, like on of my peers does. Whisper something hilarious as you pass by your peer in team teaching. Gets me every time!

Come on!! When you've got a healthy morale among the staff, you've got some healthy roots for that School Tree. And, when these key elements are added into the mix, we come up with a proactive staff environment from which children and adults can flourish. Here's to keeping our school families happier! Happy Schools Rock!

 

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